Two women are talking. One asks:
- My husband and I always go on vacation together. And you?
- Yes, and we usually together, but a few years ago, we decided to experiment and went separately.
- So what, I liked it?
- Yes i liked it.
- And to the husband?
- I don’t know, he hasn’t come back yet.
So let’s drink for the fact that even after many years, you would not be attracted to such experiments! *** Two friends met.
- Your husband cheats on you, has a lover, and you don’t react like that! - says one.
- You see, in our current financial situation, we can afford it! - the other answers.
Let's drink for prosperity and great opportunities! *** The wife of one man had many lovers. She spent one night with one of them. This went on for a long time, and here one of my husband’s friends could not stand it and said to him:
- How long to? Prevent her from leaving home at night.
- Yes, I’ll do it as soon as I see her, ”the man replies..
Let's drink to the wives who spend every night at home! *** In prison, a newcomer is brought to the cell. Everyone gathered around him and began to question:
- How did you get here?
- Yes, out of distraction.
- Like this?
- He wanted to steal the bride, but in time - only a dowry. *** A woman brags to acquaintances:
- I have such a good son-in-law! I recently bought two televisions at once.
- Why two? - long thought friends ....
- Mother-in-law told me that she would give half her life for TV! - the son-in-law clarified the situation. *** The husband unfolds his purchases and indignantly tells his wife:
- What shirt did you buy me? Look at the size, she’s probably a two-meter tall ...
- I couldn’t admit that the sellers would have guessed what kind of shorty I married ... ”the wife answered. *** A guy came to his girlfriend's father to marry:
- Why don't you want to marry your daughter to me? He asks. - After all, I do not drink, do not smoke, do not walk, do not play cards and, in general, positive.
- That is why. I don’t want you to be an example to me for the rest of your life.. *** Two men met:
- What's up? - asks one.
- Yes, not really ... - replies another.
- Why? - friend is interested.
- Wife and mother-in-law completely washed down.
- Yes, you come home, knock your fist on the table: “Who is the boss in the house?” The man advises, and before that, accept for courage.
So did. Only the mother-in-law and the wife began to "saw him", went, drank for courage and - Babah! - on the table with his fist:
- Who is the head in this house?
- What the hell? - the wife gets up, hands on hips.
- What the hell? - the mother-in-law gets up and on him ...
The man in a low voice:
- Well, ... you can’t even ask? *** Odessa, Derebasovskaya. There is a young gentleman, sees a beggar on the sidelines:
- Here, take it - and holds out to him 10 kopecks. - I can’t give more, I recently got married, sorry. The beggar was indignant:
- No, you saw this frayer, he got married. So now I have to support his family? |