- It is hard to call modern matchmaking a wedding ceremony.
- And in the old days like that ...
It is hard to call modern matchmaking a wedding ceremony.
The tradition of conducting a ceremony of matchmaking is now almost completely lost. Her simplified version today looks something like this: the groom, having previously secured the consent of the bride, comes to her parents on the appointed day. It is customary to present flowers to the mother of the bride and the bride herself, and maybe a cake on the table. As a rule, parents are already familiar with the applicant, and if they have nothing against his candidacy, they agree to marriage. Official matchmaking can be considered accomplished.
An acquaintance or announcement of his decision to the groom's parents follows: on the appointed day, the future mother-in-law and father-in-law receive the chosen one of their son. Mother of the future groom is also accepted give a wedding bouquet.
Parents of lovers get together, get acquainted and discuss organizational issues.
Everything is extremely simple, while in ancient times the ceremony of matchmaking took place according to all the rules and was of great importance in the future life of young.
And in the old days like that ...
The matchmaking was held on Tuesday, Thursday, or the weekend; the number was especially favorable for this, 3, 5, 7, and 9. Having chosen the day for the matchmaking, he was kept secret, as was the route along which the bride would go to the house. The main participants in this rite were matchmakers and matchmakers. Matchmakers were selected from relatives or turned to a matchmaker for help, whose task was to find a suitable bride, collect information about her family, dowry, character, appearance, etc. Often, it was from matchmakers and matchmakers that a guy and a girl learned about each other's existence and then they could already meet secretly, but they could only see each other at a wedding.
The tradition of the matchmaking rite said that the faster the matchmakers overcome the path from the gates of the girl to the house, the faster the parents will agree to the marriage. In the house, crossing himself on the image, a conversation began. All negotiations were conducted standing so that the girl quickly got married, did not stay too long in girls.
Negotiations could and will end with nothing the first time. This did not mean at all that parents were against marriage, at that time it was simply considered indecent to hurryly give their daughter away, to give consent from the first matchmaking. Matchmakers could be sent a second or third time, although the decision was immediately clear. According to the unwritten rules of the matchmaking ritual, if the parents just keep up appearances, then they could say that they want to consult with relatives and set a date for the final answer. If the parents didn’t like the applicant, then they asked me to come another time, referring to the girl’s youth or to the “insufficiently rich dowry”. In a rude manner, exceptional circumstances and personal motives forced the bride to point the door to the matchmakers. Then the matchmakers, leaving the house, closed the door with their backs, according to the signs of the ceremony of matchmaking, this was to prevent the girl from getting married.
With a favorable turn of the matter, the groom’s parents often went to the second matchmaking. At this meeting, they already made a reservation: wedding day, upcoming expenses, bride's dowry, her duties in a new family, etc. Having safely reached agreement on all issues, bride's weddings and a day were appointed for visiting the groom's house and examining his household. We ended the meeting with a feast and funny songs.
After the rite of matchmaking, an engagement followed - an announcement of his decision to marry. Such a tradition is still alive. The engagement usually happens when the young people apply for marriage. At the common table, they announce their decision and, perhaps, relatives discuss organizational aspects of the wedding.
The engagement used to take place at the bride’s house. Under some pretext, relatives and friends were invited to dinner. The bride's father made a toast and announced the upcoming wedding. Bride dressed in wedding attire, and the groom in a strict suit sat next to each other. Sometimes, a ring with a stone was given. During the engagement, as well as during the ceremony of matchmaking, the upcoming wedding was discussed.
Now stipulate a future life together, you can conclude a contract and timed its solemn signing to the day of engagement. After this day, the young were officially considered the bride and groom. Perhaps this period of time, from engagement to wedding, is the most pleasant and exciting in the life of every person!